There is something I have noticed; it takes love to become emotional, and it takes submission to become logical.

You know, the LORD is a mystery and it is amazing how things He said many years ago are being revealed or discovered now. That shows how great and fearful He is.

Alright so back to the main thing; I realized that as logical as men are, they can never fully feel emotions; the effect/need for an action/deed unless they love. It is amazing how God told husbands to love their wives, and also to deal with them with understanding. Because whether you like it or not, women are primarily emotional, and secondarily logical, as men are primarily logical and secondarily emotional.

So with this difference, the only way we can live with each other well is to go into each other’s world to understand how things work there. Note: I didn’t say live in each other’s world. I said go: you go to learn and ‘come back’. you don’t necessarily live there.

The only passport a man can use to go to a woman’s world to understand her is the passport of LOVE. Men are uni-tasking, so if they don’t love/care about you, it is hard for them to feel anything for you. The only way a man can ‘feel’ for his wife is through loving her. When he loves her, he becomes emotional too. Note again that I didn’t say he would turn from a logical being to an emotional being. I said he will become emotional too. Thus, he will begin to have that side of her to feel.

A man can say something which can hurt his wife deeply, but wouldn’t know he has hurt her. Until he loves to feel/to listen, he wouldn’t know and may continue to repeat his wrong actions.

For male friends, you’ve got to tell them their wrongs or speak it in actions because they can’t really ‘love’ you to feel you/your pains. Until you tell them your grievances and dislikes they are likely to continue in it.

Married couples are supposed to feel and understand each other, since too much complains could ruin a good loving relationship.

Ladies, help your men to learn how to love you (from their hearts) not from their mouths/pockets alone, by teaching them what to do, refusing to accept wrongs/compromises, and most especially PRAY to God to fill their hearts with love.

A man can buy things for you and still would not love you. This is submission to them; Thus “Give her what she wants so that you can have your peace and freedom- no nagging.” Until a man loves you (like Jacob, Elkannah [Hannah’s husband], Abraham, and Isaac [he waited for 20 years with his wife to have a child _ Genesis 25:19-26]) you will never enjoy your marriage: it would be full of grievous compromises.

Women have to realize that as emotional as they are, they cannot logically think or live with their men until they ‘submit’. Until a woman gives in to submission, she will not be able to logically and lovingly love her husband. Men don’t respond to touch, and those lovey-dovey emotional things about love. If you don’t respect a man, to him you don’t love him. That is how he explains and sees love to be. Buying flowers, going on vacations, and doing those things which women love without respect is meaningless to a man. You cannot “love” them but if you respect them, and hold them in high esteem, THEY WILL FEEL LOVED by you.

What is respect? How do you respect a man?

Respecting a man is like respecting God. Do you give God ‘birthday gifts’? Do you take Him out, etc? No. What do you do? You respect Him. What do you do? You show Him reverence and hold Him in high esteem. You defend Him when someone is trying to abuse His name. You obey His commands (you meet His requests). # “If you love me, keep my commandments.” Says our Lord. This doesn’t mean men wouldn’t love to be pampered and taken out, but these things have to come after you have respected your man and hold him in high esteem. If you don’t respect your man, throwing him a birthday surprise, and the likes would mean nothing to him.

Do you get it?

Submission doesn’t make you any lower, neither does loving make you weak. If it did, God wouldn’t have instructed us to do it. He is a loving God who cares.

If you want to show your love to God, it is not about the roses you present; That would be religion. It is about the obedience, the quality time you give him through fellowship, the holding Him in high esteem, thus talking about Him to others, etc.

Men are naturally, biologically, spiritually, psychologically, physically and even emotionally different from women. If you wanted someone like you to marry, my lady, then you shouldn’t have married a man. But as long as your husband is a man, allow him to be who God made him to be; a man. Don’t change him! Don’t ‘tune’ him to think like you, a lady. His uniqueness is very important to God as it is very important to you. His uni-tasking nature is very crucial to being the head or leader of a home: He would give the needed and due attention to a cause to see to it that it is done successfully to the end, than being multitasking, joggling things together.

If you feel that you are not being loved enough by your boo, tell him about it and give it some time. If after a while you don’t see any change, or aren’t satisfied, tell God about it if he is a Christian. If he is, the Holy Spirit in him will work on him for you.

Don’t let things get/become hard. God made the world simple. It is we, mankind who out of our selfish interests have ended up making the world too difficult and complicated to live in.

Man, if you think your wife is not respecting you enough, please do tell her in harmony and love, with authority. If she listens to you and changes, you have got your wife back. if she doesn’t, ‘report’ her to God. Likewise, the Holy Spirit in her would prompt and caution her to let her feel your discomfort with understanding. #IT WORKS!

Thank you.

#Patience is a virtue.

#Patience is a fruit of the Holy Spirit.  

Amen.