Child _ A person who has not yet reached adulthood, whether natural (puberty), cultural (initiation), or legal (majority).

Train _ (transitive) To teach and form by practice; to educate; to exercise with discipline.

Way _ A method or manner of doing something; a mannerism.

 Therefore, paraphrasing our topic would become; educate a minor the method/manner of doing something (good).

Do you know why there is lot of chaos among our youth? It is because young people are being left to live this complex life without being taught any manner/method of life by the adults around them. These adults assume that when these youths get to any particular stage in their lives, they would automatically know what to do and how to do whatever. This is wrong!

Our wise, faithful and orderly God gave us a command which we ought to obey. He said that we should train a child the way he should go,… and when he grows, he will never depart from it. 

Children come to this world knowing nothing: They just innocently model what they see. If they see somebody or their siblings play with a knife, they are likely to play with one. Likewise should they see their siblings or family members play with a particular animal, they are likely to be friendly with that animal.

Children don’t know anything about their actions: Every phase of their lives is trial and error for them; “touch the fire to see what will happen. Step into the WC bowl and feel how it is.” etc. These may seem innocent, but they are dangerous in nature. Since time is of the essence and we can’t waste all of it correcting mistakes.

Time is a very expensive commodity which doesn’t get renewed no matter how much we waste/use it: It passes, and doesn’t ‘look’ back.

If somebody really wants to waste your LIFE, he tries to waste your time. Your wasted time is almost synonymous to your life being wasted: It will never come back. An example is prison sentence.

Because time is of a great essence, we shouldn’t waste it at all: Don’t leave a child to experiment everything in life in order to learn something. No! That is murderous. As an adult with a child, you must teach your children the ways of life. Note here that I didn’t say that don’t give them an opportunity to experience life. What I am saying is that, for instance, instead of leaving your poor child to touch the fire out of curiosity and get burned just to learn something about fire and burns, rather tell him to not touch the hot pot or fire because he would get burned if he does. This way he gets knowledge; if he obeys, he would have learnt better, if he doesn’t obey, he would have learnt even harder: This is the way to go.

You are an adult for a reason; you have experienced life, and have been privileged to go through some of life’s ups and downs to know your left from your right in almost any predictable situation. Don’t waste it! Don’t waste the experience you have gotten. It is these experiences with its wisdom which God wants you as a parent to teach your kids.

In doing this, make sure you don’t impact your fears into your children: Just give them the lessons, and let them experiment with the knowledge you have given them with their own understanding. Sometimes they being trusted to try things on their own builds their self-esteem. Should you be in the habit of doing everything for your children as a parent, you paralyze them. Like a class teacher, you needn’t do the home works, and assignments for your pupils. All that you need to do is to teach them the knowledge they need which you have and leave them to process it on their own. Please don’t think for them. Just be open minded and approachable so that they can talk to you about any challenges they may face.

Being a parent is such a beautiful thing. It looks stressful to some people because they try to figure EVERYTHING out by themselves, leaving no space for nature to run its course. You are not in your child’s mind, neither do you two carry the exact same mind. Your child is young and inexperienced unlike you. So it is obvious that what you know, he doesn’t know yet, and what you understand he doesn’t understand YET. You are to train him in love. Don’t train or treat him as if he was your peer: HE ISN’T. He is a child of his own and has to be given room to live and experience life and the world in his own way.

Even if your children are going astray, don’t panic. Some of them like the prodigal son have to experience the feeding on pig feed before they can come home whole (emotionally, mentally, psychologically, spiritually and physically). DON’T PANIC!

It was God who gave your child to you, so when things gets difficult even after you have trained your son with all the wisdom you have, do go to God in prayer to work on your kid’s heart to build in him self-control and all the other fruits of the Spirit. Don’t try to ‘police’ your child expecting him to obey you in ALL things without making any mistake. Does God do this with you? Does God police around and quickly punishing you with death/disease for disobeying Him? No! God doesn’t do that. He doesn’t do that to your sinful and sorry self. He deals with you with patience, and not hot temper iron hands, or else you would have been dead by now in your sinful sins.

Make room for your child to make his own kind of mistakes: Some knowledge are better absorbed through mistakes. Should your child be a boy, then please expect lots of these mistakes(experiments) from them. Boys love to do what is model before them, as well as experiment with what they think they know or have been taught. Please do not be too emotional about it.

All that you need to do is to coach your child through this life. As a child, teach him how to brush his teeth among the other things. Don’t expect him to just know. He wouldn’t, he can’t, and it is YOUR DUTY!

Like flowers in a beautiful garden, make sure you water your children with sweet, and good words. If the words in your mouth is not good, don’t say it to anyone, not even your children. Make sure everything you say to your children encourages, exhorts, teaches, rebukes, and corrects them[2 Timothy 3:16-17].

Don’t abuse your kids with your words; [James 3:6]

Children are beautiful creatures; it is how you water and nurture them (with your words and the Word of God), that causes them to either become good or bad (1 Corinthians 3:6-9).

I know they can be very stubborn, but it is all part of the beauty of their growth, and your parenting. However, be mindful of the company they associate themselves with because God says that bad company corrupts good manners. Don’t let all the labor and toil you have gone through and endured to bring the best in your child be wasted by some bad company. Be mindful of the environment you put your child in; be it school, church, or any organization.

I wish you all the best.

Have a fruitful and blissful parenting.

Amen.

I Love You.