Men are primarily logical, while women are emotional.

The woman wants to be loved ‘emotionally’; something which is not usual for the man to do. The man wants to be ‘logically’ loved (submitted to, reasoned with, etc), something which is not usual for the woman to do. What do we do? Should we become gays? If so, then how will mankind grow through procreation? The v*gina was made for the p*nis, and the p*nis for the v*gina.

Should we are to stay together as married couples, what will be the solution for this primary differences? The solution is two these steps:

The first is Love. If you marry the person you love, “not the person your money could afford” you would be able to love your woman ‘emotionally’. Why? Because the love you have for her will not make you self-ish: you wouldn’t be thinking about yourself only.  If you should find yourself being selfish in your relationship, then know that you haven’t got any love.

When a woman loves a man, she becomes self-less too. She puts her man first. She is able to easily learn his logical way of being loved.

“But what if love wanes? What if we can’t ‘feel’ the love anymore? What if life circumstances make loving each other tough? What do we do?” You may ask.

And the answer to that is the second step. Which is, have the Fear of God! As a man, if you are a true follower of Christ, then His Word, and the Holy Spirit who is in you will teach you how to live like Christ. And since Christ is love, you would be able to love your neighbor (in this case your wife) as yourself. Even if your wife has become so ‘evil’ that she now qualifies as your enemy, scriptures say that you are to love your enemies and pray for those who persecute. Thus, wherever you go, you ought to exhibit love, be it to your spouse or a stranger. You are to owe nobody anything but love. I know this is hard, as it is a SELF-less thing to do. But won’t you like it if you are killing two birds with this one stone (obeying the scriptures so that you would be loved by God, and ‘secure’ your home in heaven, while making your wife feel ‘undeservingly’ loved. Thus, having a good marriage)? As tough as this second step is, if it would give you these two rewards, then I think it is worth it. What do you think?

Therefore, the two steps to help you stay married are, MARRY WHOM YOU LOVE, AND, HAVE THE FEAR OF GOD IN YOUR HEART.

“Why are there so many divorces?”  Divorces exist because there isn’t love, or the fear of God in us, and our marriages. What people call love isn’t love. It is just a Hollywood scripted romance. The true nature of Love is Death! If you love totally, you DIE to Self. Love is indispensable, and the lack of it be very detrimental to us. The lack of love in marriages could even be seen in marital sexual intercourses: It is so self-centered; “Did I cum? Did I enjoy myself? Was the sex fun for me or a waste of my time? I am not in the mood. I don’t care about how he/she feels.  Some even go as far as seeking other sex partners to ‘make up for their spouses’. How disgusting and dishonoring this is to marriage.

Let’s understand that being in church doesn’t guarantee that you are a good Christian (FOLLOWER of Christ), just as being in school doesn’t guarantee that you are a good student. You only become a good student or a good follower of Christ if you learn and apply what you learn or are taught from those ‘institutions’. So the fact that, that guy plays the piano well in church doesn’t guarantee that he is a good Christian (at home and everywhere).  And the fact that he bought you a cake on your birthday doesn’t mean he loves you. Every fisherman goes to the water body with a bait (romance) on his hook (‘sleeve’). But it is what he will do (abuse or love) with the fish (you) he catches which matters.

Find Truth (God’s Word, God’s Wisdom), and the Truth will make you free.

Amen.