I want us to look at an analogy which is common in our daily lives.

When you apply for a job, and you are called for an interview, between you and the company bosses, who gets more excited in general? Is it the applicant or the company owners? It’s obviously the applicant. Right? Because the company owners know that they can get another applicant easily (people are looking or competing for that same job position).

When you go for the interview, are you the one who asks the panelists questions or is it the panelist who asks you questions?

The questions which the panelist ask, are they prepared earlier before they even see an applicant, or do they prepare it when they see an applicant?

Could you please tell me the nature these questions from the panelists take?

Do you realize that the questions they ask is jeered towards sieving out great workers among the lot to help the company meet business objectives?

Do you think companies choose workers based on their beauty or charm? Do they put the objective and needs of the company first, before considering other things?

Now, I want you to see something. This company analogy is actually your life. It is actually you, as a lady. Like the company, dear lady, you are the prize. This doesn’t mean you would have to boast. No! I am telling you this for you to know the angle to come from, and which perspective you need to have.

A man is like an applicant. He is coming to seek your hand (means of salary) in marriage or even a relationship. He has seen something good he likes in you (even if you haven’t seen that yourself yet), so, he ‘applies’, and comes over to your company (a date).

During the date (interview), you NEEDN’T be anxious about anything. Stay calm, and collected. LISTEN to the man, because often, you would know a person through their words too. Listen to them like a boss (someone who’s got his sh*t together), and ask them relevant questions. Questions that are meant to sieve the chaff from the goods.

Men may think they are limited, but they are not. Even good men may think they are limited, but they are not. The fact that God didn’t tell woman that it wasn’t good for her to be alone, but rather told man that it wasn’t good for him to be alone means that the man NEEDS the woman more.

“Well, there are many ladies out there. I could get any if I want. Stop being hard to get through.” Well, diamonds don’t just appear on the surface of the earth. If you want diamonds, be ready and prepared to do some hard work. If you are lazy, then go for a wood. Even that requires some amount of labor too.

LADIES, YOU ARE THE PRIZE. Don’t let any low life deceive you with this line; “There are many fishes in the sea.” Then he should go get the one which suits him. But if he wants you, he would have to go through the FIRE, to either get refined or burnt. You didn’t burn him anyways. The FIRE just revealed his quality as a person; useless or useful?

As a lady, like the company scenario, before you meet any man, know what you need: Know what your company (your life, your dreams, your purpose, even your children etc) need, and prepare relevant questions (tests) which every applicant (man) would have to go through in other for you to see their worth.

Don’t be high on emotions and euphoria and let your life slip through your hands through carelessness.

I mean, what would you think of a boss who is drunk and high while interviewing you? As good as you may be, you would quickly think about ways to have his drunkenness be for your good: You would think about ways to manipulate him, and should he become sober later and question your inefficiency after he has employed you, you would gaslight him and blame everything on the drink; “You were drunk, so you probably don’t remember…. Blah, blah, blah.”

I mean, you are not a bad person, but you need that job (that girl), so you would use the current situation of drunkenness for your benefit.  Ladies, don’t let a man have his way like that. You are a door to an endless well-decorated treasure house. If you don’t guard your heart right, you are going to allow a robber into the house, and you would be left empty and dry.

Know that those euphoria feelings aren’t permanent. It is just like the high that drug addicts feel when they get a ‘shot’. Are you going to make a lifelong decision while you are high on drugs (the ‘I am in love’ drug)? No babe! You wouldn’t. So, like the boss of a great company would, have your (relationship) interview questions skewed toward the job position the person is applying for.No generalized questions allowed. Be specific! If you were interviewing someone for a fire service job, you wouldn’t ask him questions about fishing. So be Specific! It shows how serious you are.

Also, LISTEN! As I said earlier, you can learn a lot from someone through the words they speak. Don’t be so much in a hurry, being pushed on the wheels of emotions and let red flags slip by so fast without you realizing them. The hunter knows his game, and he is going to play it TO his advantage. You need to be extra careful so that you don’t get played.

Note every flag you see. You could call back for a second interview if you want to be certain about what you got in the first “interview”. There is no crime in that. In fact, big businesses do that, and every applicant prepares extra hard when they are called for a second interview. They know for sure that in other to get the job, they have to work extra hard to prove themselves in the second interview. So feel free, and go ahead to ask for a second interview (a follow-up date).

More so, after you have quietly listened, and asked your questions, ask your applicant (date) this: “Is there any question you would like to ask?” and once again, the response of this applicant will tell you more about him.

Note this also; DON’T LOOK OVER EXCITED WHEN YOU MEET A MAN. I know he meets all your criteria and even more, BUT HOLD YOURSELF. Exercise self-control [2 Timothy 1:7].

No matter how pretty or intelligent you are, you would never know it by looking at your panelist’s face. You would only know IF you were picked for the job. Not knowing yet if your panelists accepts you or not helps you to step up, so that you can do well to convince them that you are the one good for the job. So don’t look OVER EXCITED just because you got an applicant (a date, or a man).

KEEP HIM IN THE UNKNOWN, UNTIL HE HAS PROVEN HIMSELF.

Also, maintain RESPECT for yourself. Whether the applicant gets accepted or not, make sure that before any applicant (date) leaves your presence, he wouldn’t have any factual bad statement about you.

Feel free to fire workers. Feel free to turn down applicants. You are the boss of your life, and you want the best for it.

You have a purpose, and that is what you would have to pursue. Sieve men to find the quality ones who fulfill you, and your purpose.

Stay Blessed!